Whether it’s your first, or fifth time, birth is unpredictable. We don’t know how long it will take, we can’t guarantee when it will happen, and we don’t know exactly how your labor pains will feel.
I love supporting clients as they face their fears, manage their contractions, and come out of birth having tapped into a strength they didn’t know that they possessed. We have so many tools available to us: laboring positions, epidurals, hydrotherapy in the shower or bath. And the incredible power of our bodies means that we’re stronger than we think that they are. You can absolutely get through this, and I’ll be there for you all the way.
But you can have even more than that.
I’ve seen births like this.
It’s absolutely beautiful and an honor to witness. And births like this aren’t just romantic.
You might have heard of oxytocin as the love hormone. It gives us warm fuzzy feelings when we kiss and when we cuddle our babies. And this same hormone that bonds us to those we love also helps your labor move along, and can even make contractions less painful.
So as I’m practicing comfort measures with my clients before labor, I remind them that bonding is a tool for getting past fear and making it through labor.
I’ve encouraged a husband to stroke his wife’s face with every contraction. And as he whispered in her ear something meant only for the two of them while an epidural is placed, the laboring woman kept calm and still. Your girlfriends can dance with you through labor, hold you up as you squat, and breathe with you through the pain.
Rather than alone and fearful, I want my clients to know that they can feel completely supported throughout labor. Not just by me as their doula, but by their partner in this new journey of parenthood.
I don’t pretend that childbirth is easy, or that there’s any magic wand to make it feel great for most of us (orgasmic labor being the exception and not the rule). Labor is hard.
If you’d like to change the way you and your partner are thinking about birth, let’s talk.